Yesterday Is History, Tomorrow's Mystery, But Today Is A Gift, That's Why it is called The Present

Thursday, August 31, 2006

Woah.. I'm back guys, sorry for being MIA for so long, cuz firstly, i've been banned from using the com at my mum's house.. Which i dun really wanna explain here actually, but the 1 who has been updatin my blog is my sweet Dalilah Hani.. Thanks girl for everythin.. Anyways, the poems are written by me and of course i wrote it in a paper and gave it to Dalilah to help me type it down..

Sorry for the trouble girl..

Less than 2 weeks away, i'm gonna take a new path.. Yup, NS life.. I hope i get to be a better person and also be a better man and the ways of my maturity.. I'm really glad with the people that i always linger with, people like Dalilah, Eeks, Asrie, Shadan and Nasir, they really gave me strengths throughout my whole journey for the past few weeks.. And not forgettin sharin my laughs with the 1 tht used to slap me, yes Nahariah Ashraf, I'm talkin abt you baby.. I know ur boy is leavin very soon, but dun worry, you still hav me, Afiq and Red Rhino around.. Hahaha.. I hope u know wad i mean though.. Knowin you'll be celebrating ur 2 years with him very soon, i wish you all the best ok..

I got to say, certain things i can't really fix tht easily.. Hiaz.. I miss her badly.. Yes i know, even though how bad she is, or how temperamental she is, i hav to accept the way she is, and if only she know wad i've been thru instead of thinkin tht i'm enjoyin life and wouldn't care abt the internal affairs, for the record, i still miss her and love her. But it's not the time yet for me to approach her and say how sorry i was, being irresponsible son and a brother.. I guess she was right, i am selfish and pathetic... I love her a lot, and she is of all people tht i wanted her to see me off on the 12 Sept. I guess tht won't happen cuz i created so much sins towards her and God.. Hiaz... I hope the fasting month helps me destroys all the temptations i had.. I juz love to throw the darkness away from me.. It's been crampin up all over and i can't really get out...

I've come to the end of this entry and hopefully it won't be the last, cuz i had so much things tht i need express it out, be it love, friendship, family, sadness and happiness.. I love all the people tht hav been surroundin me.. You guys juz make my day everytime i see u guys.. Especially you, you know who u are...

This is me Signin out from Afiq's crib..

topsy turvy-ed @ 4:33 PM

Friday, August 25, 2006

Dalilah...teman ku sejati
Ketika ku sedih, kau selalu berada di sisi.
Senyuman manismu yang ku selalu ingati,
Kaulah sahabat yang ku selalu sanjungi
Wanita yang sopan dan penuh kesabaran
Seorang insan ku berkongsi sama tangisan
Ku bersyukur segala jasa ku diberi,
Dan ku berterima kasih kerna kau di hidup ku hingga masa kini.

---------------------------------------------------------------------

Repeating the songs that I love to hear,
Just hoping you're next to me, right here.
Sitting in the train now and wondering where to go,
How the time flies very slow.
Been thinking about you and how I miss you so,
I will never be angry at you just that much as I know.
Forgive my inconsiderate yet rude sayings,
I never thought I am such a selfish human being.
You offered me a helping hand as I need you,
I hope you treat me the same as much as I want to.
You are someone who doesnt really give up hope,
No matter what obstacle you face, you still can cope.
You're like the cloud up in the sky high,
Whenever I look up, you're still there and remind me not to give up and try.
I believe you as much as I need to,
You're my inspiration and makes me smile like you always do.

---------------------------------------------------------------------

Suara merdu yang menarik hatiku,
Pabila ku dengar teringat kerinduanmu
Matamu yang tajam yang ku terbayang,
Menyanyi lagu Kak Siti yang kau selalu sayang.
Di belakang senyuman ada merana
Jikalau kau hendak berbual, di sini ku berada
Ku biadap pabila kau menghiburku,
Maafkanlah jika ku tersinggung perasaanmu itu.
Sebalik berkawan lama ada hikmahnya,
Bermusuh-musuhan ada akibatnya
Ku tahu ku tidak menunjuk perasaan yang ikhlas,
Jangan salah faham, hati baikmu selalu ku lihat dengan jelas.

topsy turvy-ed @ 12:43 AM

Thursday, August 24, 2006

What is the meaning behind those stares?
The moment I look deeply into your eyes
What else that I need to know that you showed your care?
To me, it's about denial and your lies.
When you start to realise that I put you into so much appreciation?
That I really cared for you but I guess it was you being oblivious.
Am I not trying too hard upon consideration?
However when you're around maybe I was being delirious.
Is this too long for me to be in this kind of delusion?
I deserve to make a fool out of myself and being ashamed.
How I wish I could get out from this illusion
No matter what, I feel that I'm the one who suppose to put the blame.

p/s: To you who lost the phone, just to let you know i'm not angry with you. Im ok.

topsy turvy-ed @ 11:31 AM

Tuesday, August 22, 2006

Ok seriously i hav no idea how and wad to update cuz i had lots and lots of fun during my weekends!! Seriously.. and guess wad? i think i got darker.. Yeah! I think.. Well, we had rough sports yes i mean it, very rough!

Nasir, may look timid but he is as rough as a bull dog!! Believe me.. Some pics were taken by my very own best fren Eeks.. See himself buryin in sand.. Hahaha.. Well it was cute though.. Thanks Eeks. And Dalilah, i really appreciate all the help tht 2 days when u were there buyin for us breakfast and all tht.. I hope we didn't trouble u too much.. Guilty thot here gerl! Hahaha..

Hot bods, murderin each other, massage, rugby, captain's ball, BANTAL PELUK, (Oops! personal joke!) spin the bottle, truth and dare, hauntin ghost stories, drownin each other at the sea, dancin, cam-whoring, Uno, Taiti, spillin of cold-drinks everywhere, cryin to each other, confessions, confrontations, uncovered truths..

Hahahaha.. That's somethin i mentioned briefly..

2 weeks more to go.. Enjoy while i can.. Hiaz...

ps: You seem to disappear now, i know it's weird as it sounds, but some things are meant to be bound, it always hurts when havin you around... But thanks... for everything..

topsy turvy-ed @ 4:37 PM

Friday, August 18, 2006

Did u even bother to call?

topsy turvy-ed @ 2:31 PM

Well well, the week has really been rough for me.. I apologise for the past entry.. It's been a long time i haven't wrote anythin.. I mean poems.. I used to write tht last time.. But i actually missed writtin it though.. Well, to you who is readin this, i wanna say sorry, yes i read ur blog, i dunno u felt tht way.. But it has nuthin to do with u.. I wanna say thanks to u.. And to the person who talked some sense to me for 2 hours tht night over the phone, i wanna say, u really truly are a great friend. I really appreciate for all tht positive sayin, If it not were for you, i dun think i'll be here right now typin all this.. Love you lots! And this i dedicate it to the people who are so CLOSE to me.. I didn't realise tht u guys were there for me all this while till i did.. So here goes..

There's a part we share our sorrows,
Wherever I'll be, you'll be there to follow.
As days go by, more complications occur,
With the advice you gave, there i am to conquer.
The strength you gave in any situation I've been through,
I'll never take it for granted & I ensure tht I'll never lose a person like you.
All this while i wish to be forgiven,
With the melancholy mind that i hav driven.
Though we had our weaknesses and strengths,
Its the friendship tht keeps us together in the same length.
Let bygones be bygones,
Like wad u said, throw away the negativity and let's move on.
Every single word u said to me, made me realised,
That how important you guys are, in my daily lives..

Thanks...

I hope You liked it, i know my english is a bit rojak but, i hope you guys understand wad i'm tryin to say.. Love you lots..

topsy turvy-ed @ 1:57 PM

Tuesday, August 15, 2006

I remembered this picture tht Roxanne drew me.. The guy of course la not the gerl. It looks so cute.. and i really appreciate her.. I miss her a lot man... Sorry for you lost Rox..

Anyways, this entry is juz somethin i would like confront. Not to any1, juz for myself..

When would u realise that everytime u wake up, u did the same thing all over and over again?

You get restless and feel helpless all the time, doing nothin.. You heard me right, doing nothing...

We know that when everytime, this kind of things happen, we complain and we complain, and there's nothing we could do.

As you know, my character feel with envy. Envy here and there. I know tht I'm the kind of person who do not have talents like most of my friends, 1 is an Artist, the other is Photographer, a dancer, a comedian and a singer. All of us hav talents, tht i hav to admit, some are juz multi-talented.

Wad talent do i hav? My talent is complain. Cuz tht's wad i'm always good at, not finding a solution but juz complain. I felt stupid. And a person like me SHOULD be sanitised away from ppl who are good at somethin. This is not an entry of negativity but this is juz somethin i felt all these while.

Karma. They say you do good things and in return you get somethin good. Well, maybe tht's true. But it's never fair for me. I did something good, but in the end, i got discriminated, hurt, insulted and being look down by some people.

There's a whole in my soul. I don't even know where, where am i standing right now? wad am i about to face in future? Wad abt the consequences tht i should face? I can't predict the future. I always complain, knowin i complained too much till i got sicked of it, i then realised tht there's no use of me complainin or comparing or bullshiting around cuz i know, i'm used to it, i know tht these are the things i need to go thru, the things tht i hav to adapt with. All these things can be put to an end. But how? How do i hav to face all these pain. I juz envied people who hav a good life, good talents, things tht they can do tht i can't.

Is this somethin I hav to live with all my life? Hiaz.. Only now, GOD knows...

topsy turvy-ed @ 6:00 PM

Monday, August 14, 2006

Ok the adventures of Hilly, Dalilah and Billy was real fun! Hahaha.. Lookin at the pics, i really envyed the both of them.. Both of them look very photogenic.. Muahaha.. And also lookin cute.. And i'm juz the extras inside the pics.. Muahahaha.. Anywhos, the week has really been gr8 for me. And also gr8 for the 3 of us, We finally got to watch the Final Fireworks, and the old Sheares Bridge Highway there.. We took lots of pics.. And I'm glad it ended well, despite the road accident i saw and the fainted lady sittin next to us..

And guess wad, the NS letter came and i'm going to Civil Defence! Yay!! Well, i think i'm gonna be the next MAT CD tht Ria's gonna call me by then.. Bitch.. Hahaha.. Well, can't wait to go in tho.. Gonna suffer there as well.. Hahaha.. So there u hav it.. Wish me luck guys..

It's easy to suggest a quick solution when you don't know much about the problem,
when you don't understand the underline caused,
or just how deep the wound really is.

We're suppose to forget the past that landed us here,
Ignore the future complications that might rise & go for a quick fix.

The world is full of unexpected twist and turns & juz when you gotten the
lay of the land, the ground underneath you ships & knocks you off your feet.

Some wounds are deeper than they juz first appear, & require more than just a quick fix.

With some wound, you have to ripped off the bandage, let them breathe & give them time to heal.

Hmm, i juz loved to hear these kind of stuffs..

topsy turvy-ed @ 4:34 PM

Friday, August 11, 2006

U want an update? Here's an update for u ok! I know the past entries has been quite boring for my readers reading TV shows tht i've posted.. Well, here's something about my life.. Hahaha.. Anyways, the past few days been really exhausting yet fun as well.. Hahaha.. Been watchin fireworks with Dalilah, Eeks, Shadan, Ina, Yan and of course me! Hahaha.. We were at the National Stadium for 1 last time seeing the firewerks there.. It was Awesome!!

Yesterday was better, even thought no fireworks were appeared, we had a walkin marathon. I think it's better than Big Walk, with the laughs and the photos taken it was really exciting, and guess wad, i fell down and covered my shirt with Mud after chasing tht idiotic Eeks. Grr.. I wanna kill you Eek! We were from Bedok ---> East Coast Park ---> Yishun ---> Safra Yishun ---> Seletar Reservoir ---> Home Sweet Home..

But it was all worth it.. Seriously worth it.. I tend to get things out of my mind and enjoy with my 2 other Amigos cam-whoring.. Not only tht! They were picking on me. Siapalah aku ni kan?? Hahaha... Modellin the whole day was fun, laughin till i get stomachache and laugh and laugh the whole day..

The aches all over my body was really fun.. Hahaha.. Oh well, gng off now, wanna watch fireworks again!! Chiaoz!

Find a penny and pick it up, and all day long you get good luck..

topsy turvy-ed @ 3:18 PM

Tuesday, August 08, 2006

Everytime when i watched a season finale of a TV show tht i loved, it always ends with a question mark. Why? Why do they always do tht? I know, they want more twist and turns in the story, which i find tht amusing or rather TEMPTIN, for more....

Well, the season finale of Desperate Housewives did came to a good ending yet, mystery. It's a dark ending which viewers might find it curious to know wad has really happen back in Wisteria Lane.. Hmm.. I'm happy tht this season has ended well might be becuz tht i'm gng NS, so it's a good thing they hav ended, who knows, maybe i can get to watch it next year.. Well, the season 3 won't be shown tht fast right? Hahaha..

As for Grey's Anatomy, it was really surprisin to see 1 of the intern has fallen in love for Dr Grey. So exciting! Yikes.. Hahaha.. Can't wait to see the next week's episode..

topsy turvy-ed @ 1:38 PM

Friday, August 04, 2006

Ok this show brings me back my memories.. Memories tht me and Ria always like talkin abt it all the time.. Wad is gng to happen next and all tht crap.. Hahaha.. Yeah, so now, the season 3 returns with a new twist of Ryan and Marissa's love life, not forgettin their troubles gettin back in school with a new disciplinary teacher played by Eric Mabius, things gets more scandalous.

Not forgettin the hilarious comic-fan Seth Cohen and his girlfren Summer Roberts, all seem to go well with these 2.. I think.. Hahaha.. Well, The OC shows at 12 midnight on Tuesdays, well of course this comin episode will not be shown due to the holidays of National Day. I juz love The OC..

Ok 1 piece of good news, i got shortlisted to become 987fm Control. Well it's somethin like a competition i think. A Radio DJ competition of course. Hahaha.. Well, firstly, i was shocked to receive a call from them askin me to go to the auditions next week wednesday at 9am at Mediacorp Caldecott Broadcast Centre. And things i need to do, my NRIC, my Passport size photo and also 30 seconds of Entertainment news. How am i suppose to find tht?? Darn it.. I didn't expect to get myself shortlisted becuz i thought it juz for the fun of it, who knows i may not get shortlisted but they called me yesterday and i was pretty shocked abt it.. How?? Hahaha.. So i juz need all my frens to support me and give lots of encouragement.. Maybe with all tht i can get thru the audition.. Hehehe.. So tht's it ppl.. take care!

topsy turvy-ed @ 12:53 PM

Tuesday, August 01, 2006

Hello guys, i juz love watching Grey's Anatomy. Every week it the episodes gets more and more interesting and not only tht, i love Dr Grey's Monologue. Some of words makes me think how complicated of lives can be everyday, but there are also things tht i learnt while watching tht show.. Certain things u hav to believe wad is gng on.. I love u Dr. Grey! Who watched yesterday's episode? I almost cried watchin it. I thot Dr. Grey is gng to die.. Hahaha.. But she didn't. Thank God..

Anyways, let's skip tht ok.. Anyways, i hate to top up my prepaid card!! Cuz whenever i topped up no 1 even care to call, when it's low, there's so many ass-holes trie reachin me.. Gosh i hate tht.. Waste my money je.. Hiaz.. Wadeva la..

topsy turvy-ed @ 12:47 PM